Lindsey Shaw is opening up about why she was fired from Pretty Little Liars.
The actress, who starred as Paige McCullers on the teen drama, explained on a recent Ned's Declassified Podcast Survival Guide episode that her drug use and relationship with food at the time led the series' creative team to part ways with her during its fifth season.
"When I had my drug problem and I was in between working on stuff, you know, I would never have to address my relationship with food because I was always like, 'Oh, I could always just go get more Adderall.' Do you know what I mean? And be okay with it," Shaw told fellow Ned's Declassified alums and cohosts Devon Werkheiser and Daniel Curtis Lee. "So it was really hard, and I especially — I got basically let go from Pretty Little Liars in season five because of the weight that I had lost, and it was really an embarrassing thing."
Shaw later recalled the moment in which she discovered that she had been fired. "It was so bad. I got called into the Pretty Little Liars creator's office," Shaw said before becoming visibly emotional. "And she was just like, 'So, we're gonna let you go.' She's like, 'It's not because of your acting.' She's like, 'But do you have anybody to talk to?' And I was like, 'Um… No.' And she's like, 'Well find somebody, and we have to let you go for now.'"
Shaw starred as Paige, a close friend of the Liars and Emily's (Shay Mitchell) ex-girlfriend, from its first season until her dismissal. While on the podcast, she commended the show's creators for bringing back her character for several episodes during its final season in 2016. "It was really sweet because they brought me back in season 7 and it was so lovely of that writing team to see that relationship and that character out," she said. "But that was rough."
Shaw maintained that the series let her go "with so much care," adding, "They did me so right bringing me back for season 7 and just letting me say goodbye. I will just never forget that writer's room."
After learning that she had been fired, Shaw said that she returned to shoot her final episode — which saw her and Mitchell's characters go their separate ways in an airport — and that the scene quickly became an emotional experience for both actresses.
"I used that show as a therapy session every time I went in. I cried harder there than I did in that whole six years by myself. Everything went into the page," she said, noting that she and Mitchell were both crying so hard that a makeup artist had to assist them.
She added, "Finally, when it was done, we just hugged each other and let it be what it was. But my god, I'm so appreciative for that set and that character and for Shay and for those people who brought me back. It was a great and crazy and scary and sad, wonderful, tragic ride."
Shaw has discussed aspects of her relationship with drugs and alcohol and her ongoing sobriety journey over the years, including in a 2020 episode of the Women on Top podcast. "I was totally broken, and the velocity of me carrying forward trying to just act like I wasn't had stopped," she said at the time. "Even though it felt like death, I had no other recourse. I had to leave. Like, I couldn't leave my house when I was [in L.A.] without being wasted. I would feel like there was voices in my head. I would feel like everybody was judging me. The social anxiety was crippling."
She relocated to Arizona for two years in order to prioritize her mental health. "It was deep. It was me reconnecting with my family by pulling weeds and cleaning the paddy, of just being normal," she said. "Reading books, going to AA, finding sponsors. All this mundane stuff that — getting close with my mom again — all this stuff that I had neglected for so long."
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