Hollywoood by YDoubleR (2024)

I'm f*cked up
All of these worries (yup)
Suck up in my psyche (stuck up in my psyche)
Left on the sorry (left on the sorry)
On something that might be (on something that might be)
Harder to cope (heart of the cult)
It's pressed on lightly (It's pressed on lightly)
Feeling so deep, BPD or IE

Either way my mood gonna change
Minutes I'm ecstatic, the next I'm up in panic
Having to re-read the manual
Start to reap like annually
This outside misconception that I'm doing fine
Deja vu, she asked me how my music's going
Bleeding out of the lies I say good (ugh)
But bleeding out in rhyme, check your view
The darker truth is woven in my noose (yup)
Apart of you
The 27th of the 8th
But I'm the only one who's opened it enough
To say it's loose I
I was locked up, not even a cigarette (nah)
Was f*cked up, not letting thoughts digest (yea, yea)
They took my laces from everything I own
Was brokenhearted but the only scar was on my arm (yea)
Pills for a schizophrenic, they threw me into a clinic
Two inches from my death, the table's looking like my neck
Can no one feel my pain? I guess not (nah)
So round my throne It's has placed
I'm hung upon my fate again (sh*t)
Felt like every day was the same, I smoked some chronic (chronic)
Just to feel a little something back when I was numb (numb)
Get addicted to that feeling cause I stress about none

I run away from (trigger) fingers pressing on that gun
(you're still a young man, baby)

The lyrics in this song "Hollywoood" by YDoubleR delve into the artist's struggles with mental health and the inner turmoil he faces on a daily basis. The opening lines, "I'm f*cked up / All of these worries / Suck up in my psyche / Left on the sorry / On something that might be," convey a sense of being overwhelmed by worries and anxieties that are deeply ingrained in his mind. The repetition of feeling stuck in his psyche and grappling with uncertainties sets the tone for the rest of the song.

As the lyrics progress, the artist touches upon the fluctuating nature of his emotions, possibly referring to symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or Identity Erosion (IE). He describes the rapid shifts in his moods, from feeling ecstatic to experiencing moments of panic, and the struggle to navigate through these intense feelings. The mention of having to "re-read the manual" and the outside misconception that he is doing fine highlight the internal battles that may not be visible to others.

The artist delves deeper into his struggles with mental illness, alluding to a past experience of being in a difficult situation where he was deprived of basic necessities such as cigarettes and facing internal turmoil that was etched on his arm. The references to pills for schizophrenia and the desperation for someone to understand his pain convey a sense of isolation and longing for empathy from others. The imagery of feeling like hanging on fate and the daily monotony he faces further accentuate the artist's sense of hopelessness and detachment.

In the final verses of the song, the artist reflects on using substances like chronic to numb his emotions and escape from the overwhelming stress he faces. The addictive nature of seeking relief from numbness and running away from triggers that remind him of his struggles is portrayed vividly. The lyrics "you're still a young man, baby" serve as a poignant reminder of the artist's vulnerability and the lingering internal battles he continues to face despite his outward appearance. Overall, "Hollywoood" serves as a raw and introspective portrayal of mental health struggles and the complexities of navigating through them in a society that often fails to understand the depth of one's pain.

I'm f*cked up
I am emotionally disturbed

All of these worries (yup)
Facing numerous concerns

Suck up in my psyche (stuck up in my psyche)
Trapped in my mind

Left on the sorry (left on the sorry)
Regretful about a situation

On something that might be (on something that might be)
Tackling an uncertain issue

Harder to cope (heart of the cult)
Finding it challenging to handle

It's pressed on lightly (It's pressed on lightly)
Being subtly overwhelmed

Feeling so deep, BPD or IE
Experiencing intense emotions

Either way my mood gonna change
Inevitable mood swings

Minutes I'm ecstatic, the next I'm up in panic
Quick shifts from joy to fear

Having to re-read the manual
Struggling to understand life

Start to reap like annually
Facing recurrent challenges

This outside misconception that I'm doing fine
People wrongly assuming I am okay

Deja vu, she asked me how my music's going
Repetitive inquiries about my career

Bleeding out of the lies I say good (ugh)
Hurt by my own false statements

But bleeding out in rhyme, check your view
Expressing inner pain through music

The darker truth is woven in my noose (yup)
Concealing a grim reality

Apart of you
A part of your perception

The 27th of the 8th
A specific date

But I'm the only one who's opened it enough
The only one willing to face it

To say it's loose I
To admit it's not securely closed

I was locked up, not even a cigarette (nah)
Confined without basic comforts

Was f*cked up, not letting thoughts digest (yea, yea)
Mentally troubled, avoiding reflections

They took my laces from everything I own
Stripped of personal belongings

Was brokenhearted but the only scar was on my arm (yea)
Physically unharmed despite emotional pain

Pills for a schizophrenic, they threw me into a clinic
Medication for a mental health condition

Two inches from my death, the table's looking like my neck
Facing a life-threatening situation

Can no one feel my pain? I guess not (nah)
Lack of understanding from others

So round my throne It's has placed
My struggles persist

I'm hung upon my fate again (sh*t)
Feel trapped by destiny

Felt like every day was the same, I smoked some chronic (chronic)
Seeking escapism through substance use

Just to feel a little something back when I was numb (numb)
Trying to experience emotions again

Get addicted to that feeling cause I stress about none
Seeking relief from worries

I run away from (trigger) fingers pressing on that gun
Avoiding potential harm

(you're still a young man, baby)
Reminder of youth